Embrace the Suck
Growth comes from the struggle
My brother-in-law Rishi didn’t coin the phrase “Embrace the Suck”, but he preached it. Certainly he’d say this to his colleagues at his CrossFit sessions, but he also leveraged it more broadly, including shortly after he was admitted into the cancer treatment center and began his extended hospital stay:
“I look at it this way, regardless of how all this turns out, which is out of my control, my hope is that how Ritu and I approach this life-altering obstacle will help shape Ayanna and Jax as they move forward in their lives.
I have had zero hardship in my life; loving parents who are still together, college paid for, no real struggles academically and socially. I have a great wife, great family, great friends, great career. The first time I have to deal with real adversity I’m not going to back down and I will embrace the suck.“
We lost Rishi three months later. We continue to keep his memory fresh in our minds and in our hearts, with the assistance of several strategically placed memorials. The two that I see the most often are the above “Embrace the Suck” faux neon sign that we made for our workout room, and the “What Would Rishi Do?” purple and gold bumper sticker that I put, appropriately, on my bike.
“Embrace the Suck” rose out of the military as an articulation of the mindset that helps you persevere through unavoidably unpleasant situations, and even celebrates this challenging environment that leads to your own growth. Focus on the task at hand, and push through the physical and mental pain, and you’ll be a better person for it.
There are two other places where I’ve more recently seen this theme emerge. The first was in my reading of The War of Art, by Steven Pressfield1, and the second was in an episode of the Huberman Lab2 podcast. The suck they both talk about doesn’t come from physical challenges; their suck is an ever-present mental challenge that you have to intentionally and repeatedly battle. Pressfield uses the term “resistance” and Huberman uses the term “friction”, but they’re both talking about the “suck” worth facing, because it betters you.
